Getting things lined up...

"Lined Up"

Brooklyn Flea Philly

Northern Liberties, Philadelphia

Let me preface this by saying that despite a 90-degree forecast, hell must be freezing over SOMEWHERE because I'm posting a "techie-kinda thingamajig" today.  Even better?  I'm doing so despite hovering perilously close to "moron status" in knowing anything about it.  But I'm getting some options lined up due to upcoming changes in Blog-land.  Been procrastinating.  Funny thing is, I'm not even sure I NEED to make any changes.  But I honestly haven't heard this much angst since the last time the world was "supposed" to end.  July 1, 2013. That's when Google Reader will disappear, poof, gone foreverrrrrr. And here is where ignorance was bliss until I was outed...I don't even know IF this will effect me or not.  Do I even USE Google Reader? WHERE would I even check that (See? Techie ignoramus).  Besides editing photos, blogging, emailing, Facebooking, and a weeeeeeee bit of online shopping (that's all I'm gonna cop to cause the Better Half reads this occasionally) I'm computer illiterate.  And I kinda like it that way. I'm just not interested in knowing much else.  My face glazes over when someone tries to explain things to me that are tech-related.  Ask the Better Half about our television remote control discussions.  GLAZE, GLAZE, GLAZE...I just won't use THAT television, okay?

But maybe options are good should I actually find out July 1st that yes indeed, I HAD been using Google Reader all along.  How would I know?  I guess I will turn on the computer July 1st and have nothing to read while drinking my coffee?  Who knows.  So I now have a back up plan because who wants to drink coffee with nothing to read besides Facebook status updates?  All one needs to do is show up at a wedding with the same dress as your future daughter-in-law to embrace the importance of a Plan B, just sayin'.  I now travel with TWO dresses, and I shall now have TWO methods of reading all those blogs I follow:

I HATE to complain about "change".  It makes me feel like those old geezers I always roll my eyes at who start sentences with "well, back in MY day". You know, that mythical time when the world was apparently perfect.  When it comes to blogging I only like change when I WANT to make a change. In this case, I was perfectly happy in la-la-land.  Since I might be pushed out of that kingdom,  I'm making my vacay home at Bloglovin'.   It was pretty easy to set up, looks crazy similar to what I'm use to on Google (kinda my winner-winner chicken dinner moment),  and I transferred all my blogs that I follow in a nano-second so I won't lose youse guys on July 1st.  And I hope you don't want to lose me either in the post-apocalyptic sans-Google Reader world.  I want to be found, not lost.

Have YOU made any decisions on what to do should your Blog world soon disappear?  Hopefully this is all just another "the sky is falling" false alarm.  But if not, I don't want to be forgotten and gone with the wind on your blog readers.  So please follow me via Bloglovin' if that is the answer, or make sure you have some sort of back up plan to import all your blogs.  There is seriously is no harm in having two blog readers...OR two dresses.

Hope to see ya on the other side, may the force be with you.

P.S.  Does anyone know if following a blog via "Google Friend Connect" is in the works to be gone with the wind too?

 

I heart...

The week that was...

"I Heart"
Self Portrait
June 10 - June 17, 2013
Project 52 (24/52)

Last week was one I honestly dreaded.  Father's Day.  The first without my dad.  I didn't make it through unscathed.  But I did sit down and have a little talk with Pops.  Just thought I'd fill him in on things going on in my life.  Things that I'm sure he already knows.  Reminded me of when I was a teenager thinking I was "enlightening" dear old dad on the realities of my life.  When in truth he was the great, powerful, and all knowing Oz. Well at least a police officer, District Judge, and private eye at different points in his life...which is even MORE powerful than Oz in a small town. He knew everything, or at least pretended too!

As I was checking off my list of "guess what has happened in the six months since you left us", I realize that I have LOTS to "heart".  Besides having an amazing father, that is no longer in pain, and hopefully playing first base/pitcher/catcher/wherever on Heaven's cosmic all-star baseball team...look what's happened since December 7, 2012:

1.  Thing #1 is engaged

2.  Thing #2 is engaged  (AND getting married on my parent's anniversary.  Dad apparently has the power to pull strings even up in Heaven)

3.  Thing #3 just finished her sophomore year of high school, and is morphing into a beautiful and talented young woman

4.  The Better Half has proven over and over I couldn't have chosen better because he puts up with LOTS from me (I feel an "I told you so" coming from Dad)

5.  Mom has decided to move closer to home (the FIRST time I will live close enough to a parent to just "drop in and say hi" since I got married 31 years ago)

6.  Thing #1 got a new job.  Which means he is moving closer to home too .  Maybe a bit TOO close as he will be in one of our bedrooms til he gets married.  Let's hope we don't strangle each other AND...he makes his bed.

7.  I've really aged with the stress of this past year.  There were times I looked in the mirror and didn't even recognize myself.  But I am finally emerging from the weight and taking care of myself.  Exercising regularly, eating clean, letting go of stress.  But I want my dad to ask God if there is a special prayer I can say to tighten up my saggy knees.  Because THAT is truly one of God's mysteries. Weren't locusts and a plague bad enough, but saggy knees TOO?!?

8.  I'm learning to not sweat the small stuff, besides the saggy knees thingy.  Actuuuuallly, I think I'm SUCCEEDING (Stop laughing Pops!)

9.  I've cut off some relationships that just weren't good, and I've done my part to mend some that needed fixin'.  And I feel pretty good about both.

10.  I've realized I'm much stronger than I thought.  I always have my family, faith, friends and the creative outlet of writing and photography to get me thru most situations.   And if all else fails...there is always humor.

Yes, I miss Dad every day.  But I have lots to heart too.  I guess I just didn't put it all together until I sat down and had a little talk with him.  I have a feeling dad knew the outcome of our talk before I even started.  I heart that about him too.

Happy Father's Day...the good, the bad, and the ugly...

Happy Father's Day.  This is a tough one for me this year.  The first since my dad passed on December 7, 2012.  I find it NOT ironic at all that he passed on the "Day of Infamy".  I actually find it poetic justice, and I'm pretty sure he would have liked the association.  Feeling kinda down this Father's Day.  I think I will actually go visit Pops today.  It will mark the first time I've been to his burial sight since he passed.  I just never felt the urge to go there...until today.  It's just a "shrine".  Not where dad truly is.  That place would be my heart.  But today I'm feeling I need something physical.  So I'm taking my heart to the cemetery and plan on having a good convo with dad.  

I thought in honor of Pops, I would re-post my blog entry from LAST Father's Day.  I posted this originally on June 15, 2012.  Happy Father's Day dad.  Alzheimer's might have robbed you of your memories, but I'm still here which means your memory lives on.

Happy Father's Day...the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly... (originally posted 6/15/2012)

Happy Father's Day to my male parental unit.  Yes, posting a bit early.  But I've had Father's Day on the brain for awhile now.  Dad has taken up permanent residence in there recently.  Which I guess is fair since I've probably occupied his brain in varying degrees for the last 52 years.  My Pops, gosh I love him.  He is my first love.  He is the man I use as a measuring stick for every guy who has come in and out of my life.  He is my hero. Father's Day is a bit tough this year.  Pops has Alzheimer's.  I hope he remembers that I love him.  I hope I told him enough.  But I'm thinking it is never enough.

"Alzheimer's...Looking Over My Shoulder"

I visited Pops earlier this week.  It was a visit no different than what I have become accustom to.  Which is a disconcerting realization in itself.  I was happy for the nurses aide who came to sit down at our table when she noticed I was showing dad a family photograph from Thing #1's recent law school graduation.  Dad didn't know who any of us were in the photo, and appeared a bit stressed by the situation. Perhaps the aide saw that I was getting a bit teary eyed.  I'm just glad she plopped herself down for whatever reason.  One-sided conversations are extremely exhausting (I'm sure a bit of Karma from all those dad/daughter teen-aged talks).  She joked with dad a bit.  Those workers on the floor are angels disguised in scrubs. Then she said to me "I'll bet your dad was a GREAT father...I can tell by just seeing how he looks at you". He still is...no past tense needed. But her insight into my dad made me smile.

My dad was a police officer in Washington, D.C. and he was a District Justice in our home town.  He had MAJOR connections...for a small town.  Connections that absolutely KILLED my social life!!!!  I replied "Oh yeah, he was a GREAAAAAT dad, but he made it nearly impossible for me to get a date!!!".  That's what happens when the police department has your make and model car, plus license plate number on file...all courtesy of my Pops.  Add in the fact he was a downright imposing figure physically...all 6'4" of him.  In part, I think it was why I was so anxious to leave town as soon as I could, it's tough always being known as "The Judge's" girl.  I never wanted to let him down by doing something to embarrass him.   I rolled my eyes telling her the stories, then admitted "But...I am soooo much like him".   Up until a few years ago, that was the one accusation thrown at me that would totally flip my lid.  "You are just like your dad!!!!"  Yep, the good, the bad AND the ugly.  

"By the way, I paid him to take you"

(1982)

The Good.  Gosh, the list is actually longer now than I remember it being when I was growing up.  I don't think I truly appreciated dad's humor until my wedding day.  As we started to walk down the aisle he looked at me and said "By the way, I paid him to take you."  WTF??!!??  But immediately followed by placing his hand upon mine and telling me that no matter WHAT happens, he would always be there for me.  And boy did I take him up on the offer a few times over the years.  A great combo of a dry sense of humor AND fierce sense of loyalty and protection that I'm proud to claim as my own too.  I would without remorse deploy the town police department to watch over my own Things, if I only had the clout.  I also inherited my Pop's love of ice cream, baseball, moral compass, sense of honor and family, and his over exuberance in spending for Christmas morning...but thank goodness NOT his thinning hair line.  Now THAT would just be downright embarrassing.

The Bad.  Oh yeah, Dad might be a God...but he's a God with some flaws too.  Funny, I have the same flaws...go figure.  Extreme Type A personality, perfectionist, with a middle name of "Because I said so".  It is usually when I exhibit THESE traits that the family can tick me off in a nano-second with the acute observation "You are JUST like your dad".  Irritates me to no end because these are the exact traits that made being Dad's daughter a real pain in the arse and which I swore I would NEVER be like.

"Walking a Fine Line"

And...the Ugly.  Aside from God's warped sense of humor by bestowing upon me, THE shoe maven of the family, dad's ugly, ugly, UGLY feet.  I have to admit that dad's Alzheimer's scares the bejeezus out of me.  I find myself testing my brain daily.  I start each day by reciting my Things names. If I can get those right...I'm good to go.  But seeing what ugliness this disease has brought upon this giant of a  man looms large in my own brain. Is my increasing forgetfulness and brain hiccups the beginning of the end?  Or is it just mush-brain as a result of being 52?  I have no freakin' idea.  At times, I feel I'm walking a fine line waiting for the shoe to drop on me. Albeit a fashionable shoe.  If it can happen to my hero, the sharpest man I know, believe me...it can happen to anyone.   Rational thought tells me it isn't good to let this color my world.  But rational thought sometimes goes out the window when you see what Alzheimer's can do to the strongest of men.  At my most vulnerable I wonder what chance do I have?  I'm just a total Daddy's Girl who really misses being able to talk to her dad.  But I know what he would tell me "Kath, there's enough in life to worry about that IS in your control, don't sweat the other stuff".

Dear Dad,

There isn't anything I can give you that comes wrapped up in a box.  

If I could, I would call the police department and tell them to protect you with all their resources, 

no matter how embarrassing that might be

 (from personal experience I can tell ya it could be awkward at times).  

And even tho I would have paid people to take YOU at certain times in my life, 

I can tell you now that no matter what happens I will always be there for you.  

I am proud to be "just like my dad". 

And because you can never say it enough, I love you Dad with all my heart. 

But I hope you already know that...because I said so!!!!!! 

Happy Father's Day Pops

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The day I went shopping and...

...bought nothing.  Mark your calendar. Oh, it isn't that I didn't WANT to.  "Brooklyn Flea Philly" was happening at the Piazza at Schmidt's. Confusing choice of name for something happening in Philly.  Yep, LOTS I could have bought.  But I was with the Better Half.  And as luck would have it, my conscience kicked in and my rationalization skills went AWOL.  Momentary insanity.  I felt I needed to keep the notion of "I have two freakin' weddings to pay for next summer" in my brain, in deference to the Better Half who has been looking a bit pale lately.

"The Piazza at Schmidt's"
Northern Liberties, Philadelphia

As the name implies, the market is held in a piazza built at the old Schmidt's brewery.  They claim it is reminiscent of those quaint piazzas one finds in Italy. Yep, and I claim Charlie Manuel, the Phillies manager for all you non-Philly folk, should be given a contract extension (I feel I need to mention I am literally HURTING myself with my eyeroll as I typed that).  Every Sunday there is an open air gathering of vendors hawking antiques...

Re-purposed furniture and vintage clothing...

Arts/crafts by local artisans, and....food

Rain or shine.  Alas, it rained on my piazza.  Literally and figurativel, since my mind somehow managed to lack any rationalization skills this particular day.  But IF I bought something, this is what I would have had the Better Half lug home for me:

1.  A very awesome table made out of yardsticks.  I have no idea where I'd use it, but that reality is sometimes where the most creative uses develop (at least that is what I tell the Better Half).

2.  The ULTIMATE coffee table book.  This is NOT why the Better Half has been looking pale lately.

3.  Softballs.   I know, I apologize for putting these right after the "Animal Castration" book.  

4.  "I've got a brand new pair of roller skates, you got a brand new key".  Which reminds me, I'm thinking of starting a photography "link-up" of my own that relates to this photo.  Have to think it thru a bit more and work out some logistics but...STAY TUNED.  Cheap gratuitous attempt at self promotion but...I REALLY would have bought these roller skates regardless.

5.  Memory of Dad.  That white wooden folding measuring stick in the middle is EXACTLY like the one my dad always used.  Actuuuuuuuuually....I think I'm gonna head back this Sunday (Father's Day) and grab it.  No rationalization, and minimal lugging required.

Sure looking forward to both Things #1 and #2 getting married next summer BUT...they are REALLY challenging my bad-a$$ rationalization skills.  Came home with nary a purchase.  BUT, the Better Half was smiling.

Just smile...

"Just Smile"
Walnut Street, Philadelphia, PA

Is there a Doc (Marten) in the house?  Just smile and call me in the morning.

Spring forth happily...

The week that was...

"Springs"

Brooklyn Flea Market, Philadelphia, PA

June 3 - June 10, 2013

Project 52 (23/52)

"Our principles are the springs of our actions.

Our actions, the springs of our happiness or misery.

Too much care, therefore, cannot be taken in forming our principles."

--Red Skelton

As Father's Day approaches, I find my dad is occupying a lot of my brain space.  He is there quite frequently, but recently even more than usual.   It will be a difficult Father's Day.  The first Father's Day since Dad passed.  But I believe it is a testament to my dad that this special day holds the significance it does for me.  I am a very lucky woman to have had a dad like my Pops.  He lead by example, and in the process taught me many principles that are now second-nature to me.  But just because they are second-nature doesn't mean they are always easy to employ.  I've had to take a few stances this past week and put some of those principles into action.  Even tho it has been difficult at times, and I didn't like doing it...I found I was happy and at peace after it was all said and done.

So thank you Dad.  You always showed me what was right, and what was wrong.  And you taught me that just because something is RIGHT, doesn't mean it's always going to be easy.  It's just going to be always RIGHT.   I'm so grateful you gave me the principles to spring forth from....happily.

I can't even count how many times I have recently been in situations where I have said or thought "I just wasn't brought up THAT way".  I love you and miss you dad.  But as you can see from my thoughts this past week, you live on in sooooo many ways.  Because SOMETIMES, you just gotta take a stance and do what is right.  You keep on springing up Pops.  Thank you.

A fine time...

"Fine Time"
The Piazza at Schmidts
Philadelphia, PA

Meandering.  Strolling.  Wandering.  Exploring my city.